I learned that food doesn't need to control you. It's controlled me for the last 10 years, but I think that ship has finally sailed. I bought a chocolate bar the other day because I felt like I NEEDED it... After taking two bites I flushed it down the toilet. Why? I don't need that chocolate. It sure didn't make me feel good before and it definitely won't now. And plus, after not having sweets for 5 months it was wayyyy too much. Lol.
I've learned that I too can be anything I want to. And right now, I want to be healthy, fit and strong.
This is January of 2013... It took 3 of us to flip that tire.
Today, I did it all on my own. The other day I back squat 160 pounds and dead lifted 190. Before I wold have said no way could I do that.
I've learned that I cannot do anything on my own. I've needed Jesus more through this deployment than ever. I'm in constant prayer for my husband, prayer that my time here will be used wisely, and so much more. I've met some great people here and will cherish their friendship forever!
I've learned how sweet and genuine people can be. It doesn't matter if you are 3 rounds behind everyone at crossfit pax, they will stand there and cheer you on and help you get to the finish line. There are always new people walking in the door, but the second they are in a class with us... We are family. I have had people cry with me, share my joy, and throw a party when I hit the 60 pound mark. I'm really going to miss them the most.
I've learned that even tho Andy and I are what feels like a million miles apart, he's still there to listen to me cry, make me laugh, talk me through a melt down, and encourage me when I need it most.
And most of all... I've finally learned to love myself. For years I felt like I was never good enough because of how my body looked. I felt different and set apart from people... Even disconnected from my own family at times... But now I feel stronger both physically, mentally and emotionally.
I couldn't have done any of this without my amazing brother, unbelievable sister in law, and supportive husband. JD and Jade not only let me live with them for 9 months, but they teach me how to cook healthy, and give me full gym access... I don't know how to ever repay them! They've taught me more in this short 5 months than I could have learned in years! Andy told me to quit my job and take this opportunity. It was a financial leap of faith, but he knew this is what I needed, what we needed.
So to say my 5 months in Maryland have been great would be an understatement. I can't even begin to describe how different I feel. A feeling that I don't plan on letting get away for many many years! ;)